QUESTION: How do you decide when to quit a book?

Are you a hardcore "If I start the book, I have to finish it" type of reader or do you allow yourself to quit as soon as you decide you don't want to go on? 

I participate in an online book club with members from around the world, and every now and then the idea of either quitting a book or reading to the end NO. MATTER. WHAT. comes up in discussion. 

I used to be firm about finishing every book NO. MATTER. WHAT.

Now, I shake my head when I think of how much time I wasted forcing myself through books that I truly did not enjoy -- and a couple that I truly hated. 

WHY?

I think part of my obsession with finishing books I started had its roots in a sense of needing to be a "good girl" and "perfect." I felt a false sense of obligation to each book -- the book didn't care if I finished it. The author and publisher wouldn't ever know. The librarian or book shop owner would never know. No one would know unless I told them.

It is possible that someone said something along the way that supported this false sense of commitment and responsibility -- after all, my mom was a kindergarten teacher (with forays into grades up to third), her parents and her brother were teachers, various aunts and uncles were in or peripheral to education, and my grandmother was a librarian. 

Reading was basically in my skin, my blood, my bones. I identified myself as a reader from an incredibly young age, and I probably absorbed many false beliefs about what that means as well.

My friends, if you too feel compelled to finish every single book NO. MATTER. WHAT. -- free yourself! You don't need to waste your time and energy on books you truly don't like, don't connect to, or just want to put down for any number of other reasons. 

Right here, right now, I give you permisison to put down the book you don't want to finish and find something else to read. No one will know unless you tell them and most of them won't care anyhow.

Please note, friend, I am not talking about assigned reading for school -- those books should probably be read all the way through, even the ones you can't stand.

When I became a mom at 24, I found myself with a lot less time and energy for reading due to the obvious newborn in my arms, but also due to an unsupportive and abusive partner, needing to work too, and trying to finish my undergraduate degree despite my partner's multiple attempts to stop me. I was still committed to reading every book to the very last page. As a result, I read a lot less which wasn't great for my mental health.  

A few years later, I became a single mom and had even less time to read.

I can't pinpoint the moment or experience that changed my attitude, but somewhere in my late 20s or early 30s, I gave myself permission to quit a book after 20 if I just hated it or 40 pages if I sort of liked it but not enough to keep going if I wasn't hooked by that point. And, more recently, I've given myself to quit a book even when I'm almost finished -- I just set down a memoir that was OK and easy to read, but with less than 20 pages to the end, I was bored and fed up with what started to read like a flippant, unrealistic attitude on the part of the author. All I could think as I got further and further into the book was, "Why didn't the editor step in? Maybe this was the author's experience, but do most real women feel this way about life?" Ugh...I put it down, walked away, and feel no guilt!

If you aren't enjoying what you are reading, PUT THE BOOK DOWN!

Leave a comment and let me know how YOU decide to quit a book! OR if you are committed to finishing, even if you hate the book, let me know why!